Continued hope for reconciliation

From “Why we love” by Helen Fisher:

Why do lovers continue to hope, even when the dice of life come up relentlessly against them? Most still hope the relationship will spring back to life—even years after it has ended bitterly. Hope is another predominant trait of romantic love.

I think this tendency to hope became implanted in the human brain eons ago so our ancient forebears would doggedly pursue potential mates until the last flicker of possibility had expired.

About Jesse

I’ve been helping guys recover from their breakups since 2012. Work with me to fast-track your recovery.

Comments

  1. Six weeks since breakup told her to leave she was doing drugs and out of control loved her so much but she done everything under the sun to me over the years n I still love her can’t get her out of my head ain’t talked to her in 6 weeks n she text me n like a dumbass I called her was supposed to see each other but now that seems to be changing and I back to square on no sleep n crazy thoughts can’t get her off my mind

    • Hey Fred,

      It’s normal when we get back in touch with our exes that we feel like we’re back to square one.

      That’s why you need to go no contact and stick with it. It’s hard — it’s very hard. But your feelings will settle down with time.

      Six weeks is nothing, and six weeks is the same as 0 days if you’re not going no contact in other areas. I recommend blocking her number, blocking her on all social media and even taking a social media break.

      If you’re serious about recovering, you get rid of all reminders and you make sure she can’t contact you.

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